Off the Bye, Now Down to Bethel UUN #4-24 Inbox
Dear Energized Fans —
We’ve had a couple weeks, thanks to the bye, to ruminate with great satisfaction about the outcome of the Wartburg game, how our boys played a mostly complete game on both sides of the ball. We saw them generate a lot of spirit, excitement, support of teammates, and confidence on the field. Assuming we keep it up, even in the face of some lesser teams, we show great promise for the year.
How fast things change. Nearly all the teams in the Top Ten have either lost or suffered very close games by teams ranked lower, and even significantly lower. Of great satisfaction was to see #3 Whitewater getting beat at home in front of 13,000 fans by an unranked team. But #2 Cortland and #4 Mount Union nearly suffered losses too. Locally (in St. Paul), even skeptics of UST’s team prowess this season had to be shocked by the gargantuan differential in this score with the Tommies being shut out by Lindenwood University 64-0.
Now — well rested, nicks & aches healed, and properly prepared by coaches and individual study — our #5 Johnnies head down to Arden Hills to play Bethel University on Saturday. Nobody reading this has to tell the team how important this game is, so forget about a let-down of any sort. We should find out a lot about ourselves during and after this game, which will be intense. Sure hope many of you fans come out to support the Jays.
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Senior wide receiver #1 Marselio Mendez makes the first down before being pushed out of bounds by a Wartburg defensive back. (Photo by Jason Wachter / For St. Cloud LIVE)
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In honor of our hosts, I must rerun my favorite Baptist joke:
Once this Bethel University grad saw a man on a bridge about to jump. He said, "Don't do it!" The despondent man said, "Nobody loves me."
The Royal said, "God loves you. Do you believe in God?"
He said, "Yes." The Bethel man said, "Are you a Christian or a Jew?" He said, "A Christian." The Royal said, "Me, too! Protestant or Catholic?" He said, "Protestant." Our Royal replied, "Me, too! What franchise?" He said, "Baptist." The Royal said, "Me, too! Northern Baptist or Southern Baptist?" He said, "Northern Baptist." The royal replied, "Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist or Northern Liberal Baptist?"
He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist." Our Bethel man said, "Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region, or Northern Conservative Baptist Eastern Region?" He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region." The Royal said excitedly, "Me, too!"
Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1879, or Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912?" He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912." The Bethel guy said, "Die, heretic!" And pushed him over.
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About the Bethel Royals —
There are some new things about #24-ranked Bethel this year; among them are a new head coach, Mike McElroy who replaces retired legend Steve Johnson, and a new 6’5” speedy sophomore quarterback, #9 Cooper Drews, who transferred to the Royals from St. John’s after Aaron Syverson decided to return to the Johnnies. He succeeds the phenomenal QB Jaran Roste who is now quarterbacks coach on the staff.
But it seems that the Royals still retain a lot of the same old, very talented core as we’ve seen before. For instance, our old nemesis, WR #2 Joey Kidder, is back for a fifth season as a grad student; he’s been killing us for four years. His productive partner in crime, WR senior #15 Micah Niewald, makes them one of the more dangerous receiver combinations in the MIAC, if not D-III.
It remains to be seen how well young QB Drews connects with this duo when playing a team of the quality of SJU, however if their last game is any indication — a 51-30 win last Saturday over UW-Eau Claire — they seem to be getting it down: Drews passed for 294 yards and five TDs and rushed for 78 yards and two TDs to lead the host Royals past the Blugolds. Joey Kidder had 11 receptions for 126 yards and four TDs for the Royals. Not a bad day’s work.
Along with his passing arsenal Drews has fifth year RB #26 Aaron Ellingson and senior WR and return specialist #18 Austin Auld to work with, along with a really good kicker, senior #33 Hugo Cifuentes.
Defensively, maybe it won’t be all that new under McElroy’s leadership since he has been the defensive coordinator for the past seven years. And he has two preseason All-Americans returning to wreak havoc in the secondary — defensive backs sophomore #8 Matt Jung and junior #9 Devin Williams. Also in the defensive backfield are experienced grad student #21 Nate Farm and fifth year #22 Gavin Rataj. In 2023 these guys together snagged 19 interceptions. Also of note defensively are senior linebacker #45 Caden DeWall and senior defensive lineman #92 Noah Richards.
Last week Jung led the Royals with two interceptions and a game-high 10 tackles in the win over Eau Claire. His second interception of the game came in the end zone, preventing a potential game-tying score. Five of his ten tackles were solo. This performance led to his being named to the D-III Defensive Team of the Week, the second week in a row; last year he also was named to that team three times. Very impressive. Overall, Bethel’s defense for the second straight week held a team under zero yards rushing as the Blugolds got -15. Also impressive.
Bethel is the defending MIAC champion, which we all know is bogus due to the soon-to-be-replaced inter-conference playoff system that screwed us, and the fact that we handled them decisively 27-7 at Collegeville last year. The Royals made the playoffs but were given #5 Whitewater to play in the first game of the bracket. Although they lost not unexpectedly, it was a slam on the MIAC that the D-III powers think so little of our conference that they matched up one of the top teams against us in the first round when they usually sacrifice a team from a conference like the UMAC as not really worthy of the playoffs.
Bottom Line? Play like we did against Wartburg and we can overcome Bethel’s obvious strengths. It will take a consistent effort, a complete game, from opening kickoff to the final play though. Last week Bethel and Eau Claire were pretty close until the final 5 minutes. Their 102-man squad, like SJU’s, is composed primarily of Minnesota lads and, again like our starters, plenty experienced. Their offensive line seems to be a bit more bulky than ours (not counting the 410 lb. freshman who most likely won’t get to play) but shouldn’t be the deciding factor. GO JOHNNIES!
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About the Tailgate —
Bethel University officials have directed us to the east lot (or SOHO Lot) for our tailgate parties. It’s not a huge lot and Bethel people are also vying for a place to park and/or drink their (ahem) non-alcoholic beverages, so the wise person will get there early. How early? It will probably be filled by 10:30, no later than 11. And the best way to get there is to drive SOUTH on Hwy 51.
Some friends asked for ideas for both pre- and after-game celebrations in addition to the tailgate. Here are some thoughts:
The Exchange a couple miles straight west of Bethel in New Brighton would have been great for a pregame gathering, but they aren't open until 3 pm on Saturdays since the pandemic. That might be a place to head for afterward though. It's convenient and nice. Hope to see some Red-clad folks there for a victory celebration. https://exchangefoodanddrink.com/
Another place that's convenient is The Blue Fox east of the college on Lexington Avenue just south of I-694 a block or so. Open at 11 am.
Blue Fox Bar & Grill Arden Hills opening hours 3833 Lexington Ave N | FindOpen
Finally, there is the closest of all, Lindey's Steak House located very close to and just south of the main entrance. It's open at 11 am on Saturday and you can get a nice burger there (Very limited menu for lunch. Heck, a very limited menu for dinner as well.) https://theplaceforsteak.com/
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The Bethel Entrepreneurs —
A Bethel football player had an idea for a business last summer. To execute his novel plan he hired a defensive lineman teammate who also lived in their apartment off campus. He explained everything to his friend. "First, you secretly flatten people's car tires. Then, offer our tire changing service through an advertisement. Got it?"
A few weeks later, after getting no customers, the cops show up at their apartment, placing them under arrest due to suspicious advertising. On the way to jail, the Royal who thought up the plan asked his teammate about the advertisement.
"Well, I had a great idea,” the other Royal explained. “I realized we could save ourselves a lot of time by stabbing our flyer directly into the tire."
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Sophomore wide receiver #4 Riley Schwellenbach tries to push off a Wartburg defensive back in the second half on Saturday, Sept. 14. (Photo by Jason Wachter / For St. Cloud LIVE)
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View From The Field —
(By Ron Tomczik ’65, Medicine Lake, MN)
The following is a summary of some of the comments heard from SJU players after the Wartburg game:
- The scout team was given much credit for the way they prepared the team for the game. Even using old film and researching other sources, our team had a pretty good head start in leading to a victory.
- Many of our players spent part of their summer on campus: weight room, conditioning, watching film, developing new plays (example: our first offensive play, the long pass, was hatched by our quarterback and receiver during the summer.
- Our D Line was constantly making last second adjustments, based on the Wartburg O-Lineup, up to the seconds before the ball was snapped. Communicating to each other on things they noticed, these adjustments resulted, especially in the 3rd quarter with quarterback sacks and rushing yardage losses.
- Our coaches have been emphasizing that the Juniors and Seniors should be bonding with the Freshmen/Sophomores by helping, teaching, training, coaching them. This has resulted in the building of esprit de corps/camaraderie and many of the team are friends even off the field.
- Coaches emphasize to players the importance of learning and improving every week.
- Big improvement in reducing penalties---but still room for improvement.
- This Team has BIG GOALS
- Running Back #27 Caden Wheeler was injured during a preseason practice. He was expected to be out for quite some time to recover. But he was visited on the SJU campus by some St. Cloud Orthopedic MDs who recommended that he have surgery. He and his advisors agreed; he had the surgery resulting in his recovery being accelerated. He is anxious to get back on the field.
- Why did so many Freshmen/Soph players pick SJU? Campus Tours-“fell in Love”, super recruiting led by Damian Dumonceaux and other coaches, SJU Football facilities, academics and, of course, our very good reputation, not necessary in that order.
- How good was Wartburg? Per players—very good---BUT not a #5-rated D3 Team. Go Johnnies! — Ron
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What’s the difference between Jews, Protestants, and Baptists?
Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah.
Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the head of the Church.
Baptists do not recognize each other in the liquor store.
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2024 Football Schedule —
(All games begin at 1 p.m.)
Sep. 7 Carthage (WI) Collegeville W 49-0
Sep. 14 Wartburg (IA) Collegeville W 35-13
Sep. 21 Bye —
Sep. 28 Bethel Arden Hills
Oct. 5 Augsburg Collegeville (Homecoming)
Oct. 12 Concordia Moorhead
Oct. 19 Carleton Northfield
Oct. 26 Gustavus Collegeville (Family Weekend)
Nov. 2 St. Scholastica Duluth
Nov. 9 St. Olaf Collegeville
Nov. 16 MIAC Week Collegeville
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Johnnie Radio Network —
Saturday’s game can be heard live on WBHR-660 AM across central Minnesota, and KDIZ-1570 AM in the Twin Cities. Mark Lewandowski, Bryan Backes ’87, and Mike Carr ’77 will call all the action, beginning with Johnnies Magazine at 11 a.m. and the pre-game show at 11:30 a.m. The game will also be broadcast on the SJU football website via Stretch Internet. This is the 26th season SJU football can be heard worldwide over the internet (660wbhr.com).
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Listening via the Internet: https://www.660wbhr.com/wbhr-st-johns-sports
Viewing via live streaming: https://miacsportsnetwork.com/bethelmn/?B=1221743
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Overheard on the LINK —
While returning to St. John’s late Friday night we heard one Johnnie say to another:
“So, I was at the La tonight, and this woman got her nipple pierced right in front of me. On a related note, I suck at darts…"
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Around The MIAC, Week 2 — Sept. 14
Gustavus at UW-Stevens Point — (If the Gusties can’t beat the lowest-ranked team in the WIAC, what will their MIAC campaign look like?) GAC prevailed 31-10, and that is a fitting margin of victory against lowly UW-SP.
UW-Eau Claire at Bethel — (How good are the Royals? They should do pretty well against the Blugolds at least. Preview the Royals as they host this lower-ranked WIAC team this Saturday, September 21, at 1 pm. Keep in mind that Concordia lost to Eau Claire 21-10 a couple weeks ago.) UW-EC is a couple notches up over Stevens Point, they beat the Cobbers earlier and yet — yet! — the Royals dismembered them 51-30.
Augsburg at Martin Luther College— (The Auggies should rip Martin L. pretty well.) And that’s exactly what happened: Augsburg up 34-7.
UM-Morris at Carleton — (Carleton is somewhat an unknown this year; last season they would have destroyed Morris, but this game might be much closer.) Well, it wasn’t THAT much closer, with the Knights handling Morris at 28-7 defeat.
St. Scholastica at Crown College — (This should be the Saints time to shine, but I wouldn’t bet on it. They just seem woeful.) As woeful as the Saints are in the MIAC, Crown College is woefuller and our Benedictine brothers in Duluth triumphed 35-15.
Saint John’s and Concordia have a bye.
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Other Games of Interest —
St. Thomas at Lindenwood (MO) — (The Tommies, now 1-2 after three games at home, travel down to St. Charles, MO to play a non-conference game at Lindenwood University, which has just moved from D-II to D-I. The Lions are 0-3 but played against better teams than UST, so it could possibly be another long day for Glenn and company.) O-M-G! Someone call 911…Glenn’s in cardiac arrest after being pummeled 64 to Aught. The Toms are now 1-3, after playing scholarship programs four games in a row. Of course, it doesn’t help that UST had five or six starters out with injuries before this game, but still…
UW-La Crosse at Grand Valley State University (MI) — (Here we have #5 D-III taking on #2 D-II in a non-conference contest. Wonder how it will turn out? Hope the Eagles are not embarrassed.) Gotta hand it to La Crosse. They stayed right with the big school and narrowly lost 20-13, thus actually going up two places to #3 for their superb effort.
Wartburg at Central (IA) — (This is the Warthogs first game since being thrashed by St. John’s, and Central is one of their strongest competitors in the American Rivers Conference…How will they do…rebound or go into a funk?) The Knights sort of did both, barely escaping Pella, IA with a 10-7 conference win. But in conference play, as Brandon Novak ‘00 will tell you, “a win is a win is a win.”
North Central at Carthage — (Not that there is any suspense about the winner here, but by how much. Will NCC hit 70? Will NCC keep in their “A” squad just to insure getting more points against Carthage than we did? Will NCC show mercy as did Gary when we hosted CC at our house?) Well, the score was 63-0, so maybe they did show mercy…and/or maybe NCC is just that much better than we are.
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Upcoming Games, Week 4 — September 28 —
St. Scholastica at Concordia — (This could be one of those 45-10 games, with the Cobbers winning, of course.)
Carleton at Hamline — (Based on their common foe, Morris, I’d say Carleton is just a bit better, so the Knights over the Pipers by 7 to 10 points.)
Gustavus at Augsburg — (This is a hard one to pick, but I think the Auggies may have a bit more in the tank than the Gusties.)
St. Olaf at Macalester — (It’s a toss-up between Mac and St. Scholastica who will end up in the MIAC cellar, but it doesn’t matter here; the Oles will carve up Mac this Saturday.)
St. John’s at Bethel — (The Royals present our biggest challenge, for they have talent on both sides of the ball. They will come out revved up. However, we should be able to score if Eau Claire could get 30 points on them, and — if our defense is up to the job — will keep their stars under control. This could be a 35 to 14 game if St. John’s plays up to its abilities.)
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More Scenes From Stearns County —
Louie Bragelmann owned a large farm for many years out near St. Rosa and he had a large pond on the far end of his property. It was properly shaped for swimming, so he fixed it up nice with picnic tables, horseshoe courts, and some apple and peach trees.
One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond since he hadn't been there for a while. He grabbed a big white bucket to bring back some fruit before starting the long walk to the remote area.
As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee.
As he came closer, he saw it was several young women skinny-dipping in his pond.
He made the women aware of his presence, and they all went to the deep end.
One of the women shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you leave!"
Old Louie frowned. "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim naked or make you get out of da pond naked."
Holding the bucket up, he said, "I'm here to feed da crocodile."
(Contributed by Peg Marrin ’65, Dallas, TX, who agreed that some old-timers still can think fast.)
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2024 D3football.com Week 3 Top 25 —
As I suggested here a couple times already, these first few weeks will show a lot of change in the national D-III rankings Read on:
(From d3football.com's Saturday, 9/21 report.) It was, to say the least, a big darn day in Division III football, especially for ranked teams. The No. 2 team [Courtland] and defending champs needed to come from behind, the No. 3 team [UW-Whitewater] got run off its own field, the No. 4 team [Mount Union] needed to survive a rally from a rival in the fourth quarter, the No. 8 team [Johns Hopkins] got spanked in the fourth quarter and the No. 10 team [Randolph-Macon] lost to a team which got shut out the week before. And that was just the top ten in action on Saturday among teams ranked in the D3football.com Top 25.
Last week I remarked I’d love to see Whitewater get beat a couple times this year. Well, one down…I love it! It was the D-III upset of the year, so far. The insufferable Warhawks were clobbered on their own field, in front of 13,000 bush league, generally-over-served fans, by an unranked, but newly-ascendant Mary Hardin-Baylor team. The result? #3 Whitewater fell to #10 while their conquerers came up to #14 from way down in “receiving votes.” I think they should have been rated higher. Idle SJU actually rose a place to #5.
Here are a few other notable movements: #2 Cortland stayed where they were but the team, Susquehanna, that narrowly lost to them actually jumped UP two places from #11 to #9. That normally doesn’t happen in this poll. Former #8 Johns Hopkins dropped down to #20 but the team that beat (read “clobbered”) them, Salisbury, rose from #22 to #11. One result I don’t understand is that former #25 John Carroll dropped out completely after a very close loss to #4 Mount Union. Doesn’t seem fair, especially in light of Susquehanna jumping up two places in their close loss. Bethel stayed the same at #24. Let’s hope they stay there after this Saturday.
https://d3football.com/top25/2024/week3
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Nursing Majors’ Department, Practicality Division —
- A nurse is the first person you see after saying, "Hold my beer and watch this!"
- Yes, I am a nurse. No, I don’t want to look at it.
- Laughter is the best medicine...except when treating diarrhea.
- Nurses can’t fix stupid...but we can sedate it.
- I love being a nurse, but I mostly love wearing scrubs. They’re basically professional pajamas.
- The nurse that can smile when things go wrong...is probably going off duty.
- No, RN does not stand for ‘Refreshments and Narcotics.'
- You know you’re a nurse if you can drink a pot of coffee and go directly to sleep.
- Nursing isn’t a career...It’s a post-apocalyptic survival skill.
- Every nurse has a best friend, Pam: LorazePAM, DiazePAM, and ClonazePAM.
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Relevant Obituaries —
Two good friends of ours have recently departed the St. John’s orbit and we will miss them from our company:
Kim Devoy ’63 was a quiet, unassuming SJU-CSB fanatic who was also a gifted attorney and loyal family man. His obit is here:
https://www.afterall.com/obituaries/KimballDevoy
Judy Regnier, wife for 56 years of Pete Regnier ’65, passed away last Sunday. She was a loyal Johnnie fan and Pete says she is still rooting for us in her new Heavenly abode. Her obit is here:
https://www.ohalloranmurphy.com/obituary/Judy-Regnier
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Additionally there are three SJU giants who have died fairly recently:
Paul Bernabei ’69 was an SJU Basketball great; he recently co-wrote a book on the history of St. John’s basketball with retired coach Jim Smith.
He was a skillful and inspiring school teacher for many years before branching out into educational coaching and training.
https://www.ohalloranmurphy.com/obituary/Paul-Bernabei
Here is a clip from one of Paul’s presentations for his Top 20 Trainings seminars: Paul Bernabei (1:06 min.)
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Judge Jim Randall SJP ’58/SJU ’62 was one of a kind: highly principled, outspoken, quirky and dedicated to the down-trodden in our society, especially Native Americans. He practiced criminal defense law and was a public defender on the Iron Range before being named to the Minnesota Court of Appeals.
https://www.twincities.com/obituaries/hon-robert-a-jim-randall/
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Norb Berg SJP ’49/SJU ’55 is remembered as legendary for his pioneering innovation and success in Human Resources and Industrial Relations, beginning with a small computer company that grew into Control Data. You can read his impressive obit below, and then a newspaper column where the author speaks of the influence Norm had on her. (Note: If you can’t open the article link, please let me know and I’ll send you an email with it printed out.)
https://obituaries.startribune.com/obituary/norbert-berg-1090268779
https://www.twincities.com/2024/08/17/working-strategies-on-masters-usage-remembering-a-friend/
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From Our Readers —
From Conrad Macina, Landing, NJ —
Well, this is great! A terrific win for the Johnnies and a week off for you. Or, knowing you, only partly off. At least you already have a profile for Bethel. Here’s this week’s Tommie joke. — Conrad
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A painting contractor is going through a house with a potential client. In the first room she says, “I’d like this room to be pale blue.”
The contractor writes this down, then goes to the window, opens it and hollers out, “GREEN SIDE UP!”
The client thinks this is strange but doesn’t say anything. In the second room the client says, “This room should be a soft yellow.”
The contractor writes this on his pad and yells out the window “GREEN SIDE UP!”
The lady is even more curious but she says nothing. In the third room, “The color here should be a warm rose.”
The contractor writes this down and yells “GREEN SIDE UP!” out the window.
The client asks, “Why do you keep yelling, ‘Green side up’?”
“I'm sorry, but I have a crew of Tommies laying sod across the street.”
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From Tom Bauer ’61/’65, Madison, WI —
Bob, I was relieved to learn over the weekend that stalwart, ardent SJU/SJP distinguished alum, John Sipe, was indeed at the Wartburg game. His presence is usually noted in the UUN, but I found no evidence in # 3-24 that he was at the tailgate, in the stands, or in any post game celebrations.
Several things factor into the great tradition of Johnnie football. A tradition that helps form a strong community of CSB/SJU students,staff,and alums. It starts with Coach Gary Fasching who is successfully following in the footsteps of a legend...no easy task. The fans have responded in numbers unusually large for a D3 program. Finally, it's doubtful that any school regardless of size (NCAA Division level) has something as unique as the UUN. Undoubtedly this labor of love to which you devote yourself keeps all friends of CSB/SJU, regardless of where they live, informed, entertained, and connected to The Monastery, The Abbey, and the schools.
If travel timing works out, Kris and I hope to see Chris and you at the Bethel game. — Pax,Tom
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And speaking of John Sipe ’61/'65, St. Paul, here is his timely contribution of Ten Somewhat Quirky Thoughts by Steven Wright:
1 - I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
2 - Borrow money from pessimists -- they don't expect it back.
3 - Half the people you know are below average.
4 - 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
5 - 82.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
6 - All those who believe in psycho kinesis, raise my hand.
7- I almost had a psychic girlfriend, ..... But she left me before we met.
8 - OK, so what's the speed of dark?
9 - Hard work pays off in the future; laziness pays off now.
10 - I intend to live forever ... So far, so good.
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From Peter Harrington ’81, St. Paul, MN —
Hello Rob, Good to see you at the Summit house tour. I signed my son Dan up for your newsletter. Just noticed your email on the fees. How much are they? I'm happy to contribute. Take care. — Peter
(Editor’s Reply: Thanks for the offer, Peter. There is no charge but from now on you, Dan and all subscribers will have to go to https://www.unofficialundergroundnews.com/ either late Thursday or early Friday to read the week's issue. That way I can still get it out for free.)
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Denis McDonough ‘92 To Receive Basten Award October 5 —
Former Saint John's defensive back Denis McDonough '92 will receive the Bob Basten Excellence in Leadership Award at halftime of the Johnnies' Homecoming game on Oct. 5. The award is presented annually to a former Johnnie football player who has exhibited outstanding leadership traits, has been involved in his community and with his alma mater, has carried a sense of fair play beyond the football field and has demonstrated an overall commitment to excellence. It is named in honor of Bob Basten '82, who went to training camp with the Minnesota Vikings before embarking on a successful career as a business executive. He died in 2012 after a decade-long battle with ALS/Lou Gehrig’s Disease.
Go here to read of Denis’ many accomplishments:
https://www.csbsju.edu/news/denis-mcdonough-will-receive-basten-award-on-oct-5/
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HOMECOMING — OCTOBER 5 —
Make plans to join us on October 5 for Homecoming 2024. Alums of all ages will find good times and familiar faces. The day is packed with events and activities, so there's sure to be something for everyone. Make the most of this chance to reconnect with our campus and fellow alums.
Check out some of the Homecoming events:
Alum book signings with Barbara Rudnicki ’64, David Charpentier ’89, Steve Hoffman ’89, and Bryan Fleegel ’07
Saint John's football vs Augsburg – Purchase Tickets
Saint Ben’s soccer vs St. Catherine
Family-friendly Homecoming celebration with inflatables for the kids at SJU
Family-friendly Fall Fest ’24 at CSB
CSB Athletic Hall of Fame – Register
J-Club Hall of Honor Banquet – Register
https://www.csbsju.edu/alums-and-friends/homecoming/
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2024 Entrepreneur of the Year Awards —
The Donald McNeely Center for Entrepreneurship is proud to present the 2024 Entrepreneur of the Year Awards to three CSB/SJU alums who have successfully launched and led ventures, seized opportunities, and initiated changes that create value.
The awards will be presented on Monday, Oct. 28 from 5 to 8 pm at the Metropolitan Ballroom and Clubroom, 5418 Wayzata Blvd, Golden Valley, MN 55416. Cost is $35-$50, plus sponsorship opportunities.
The awardees are:
CSB Entrepreneur of the Year Laurie Gerhardson ’04, DC, CACCP, Owner, Gerhardson Chiropractic, LLC
SJU Entrepreneur of the Year Anthony Schmidt ’09, Founder and CEO, Tarmac, a software development company
CSB+SJU Social Entrepreneur of the Year Katie Kalkman ’06, Executive Director of Impact Hub MSP
For more information go here: 2024 Entrepreneur of the Year Awards
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Wicker’s Health Rant —
What are seed oils, and why are they slowly killing us?
Often found in ultra-processed foods, these seed oils (aka vegetable oils) can cause chronic inflammation and diseases: Canola oil (aka Rapeseed oil), Corn oil, Cottonseed oil, Grapeseed oil, Soybean oil, Sunflower oil, Safflower oil, Rice bran oil, and Peanut oil. They’re everywhere, especially in ultra-processed foods, pre-packaged foods, fast foods, snack foods, and restaurant foods. Having thrown all those oils out, I prefer to use extra virgin olive oil, unrefined coconut oil, and avocado oil; even organic butter and organic lard used sparingly are better than refined seed oils. (Chris still uses, for her infrequent baking, a little organic canola oil.)
Please read this brief but very informative, balanced article by the Cleveland Clinic, one of the better ones I’ve read on the subject, although it doesn’t get specific on just how the oils damage our bodies over the long run:
https://health.clevelandclinic.org/seed-oils-are-they-actually-toxic
Video: A Brit briefly discusses seed oils
Seed Oils Causing Chronic Disease? (2 min.)
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Battle Between the Sexes, A Continuing Series —
A married couple in their early 60s were out celebrating their 35th wedding anniversary in a quiet, romantic little restaurant. Suddenly, a tiny yet beautiful fairy appeared on their table and said, "For being such an exemplary married couple and for being faithful to each other for all this time, I will grant you each a wish."
"Ooh, I want to travel around the world with my darling husband," said the wife.
The fairy moved her magic wand and suddenly two tickets for a deluxe cruise on a luxury liner appeared in her hands.
Now it was the husband's turn. He thought for a moment and said: "Well, this is all very romantic, but an opportunity like this only occurs once in a lifetime so, I'm sorry my love, but my wish is to have a wife thirty years younger than me.”
The wife, and the fairy, were deeply disappointed but a wish is a wish. So, once again, the fairy moved her magic wand and the husband became 92-years-old
Moral -- Men might be ungrateful idiots but fairies are women!
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Arthur & Loxtercamp Named Co-Recipients of 2024 Fr. Wilfred Theisen Award —
Saint John's University graduates Kevin Arthur '24 and Nate Loxtercamp '24 were named the co-recipients of the 2024 Fr. Wilfred Theisen Student-Athlete of the Year Award, sponsored by the J-Club, on Thursday, Sept. 19.
The award recognizes an SJU varsity, senior student-athlete (or two) who has excelled in the classroom and in their sport.
Arthur and Loxtercamp will be honored on Homecoming Saturday – Oct. 5 – at the J-Club Hall of Honor banquet. The dinner and enshrinement ceremony begins at 5:15 p.m. in Guild Hall (Old Gym). A Homecoming Celebration social will take place outside the venue following the Johnnies' football game against Augsburg in Clemens Stadium prior to the dinner and program.
Go here to read of their accomplishments: https://gojohnnies.com/news/2024/9/19/the-j-club-arthur-loxtercamp-named-co-recipients-of-2024-fr-wilfred-theisen-award.aspx
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The Final Word —
On Joining the Baptist Church
The minister meets with three married couples who want to join the Baptist Church. The first couple are retirees from Florida, the second couple are in their early 40s, and the last couple are newlyweds, having been married only three weeks. "We have developed a small test for those who want to join, I'm afraid. You must go without having sex for two weeks ... and if you succeed, then you will welcome you with open arms."
The three couples shake the minister's hand and leave, determined to meet this test.
Two weeks later, the three couples return and meet with the minister in his office. "Did you succeed in your test?" he asks the first couple.
"Yes sir, we did. We have not had sex in two weeks." The older husband and wife beamed at the minister, and he shook their hands and welcomed them to the church.
Moving to the second couple, he asks the same question. The middle-aged couple look at each other, and say "Yes sir ... we struggled a bit with it, but we have managed not to have sex for two weeks as you requested." The minister smiled, shook their hands, and welcomed them to the church.
Then, he approached the newlywed couple, both in their early 20s. "My friends, did you pass the test?" The couple, shame-faced, look at each other before the husband answers, "I'm afraid not, Pastor. We did really well the first 3 days, but on the fourth day, my wife bent over to pick up a can of corn and I just happened to be behind her, and before I knew it, we were having sex right then and there. I'm very sorry," he said, hanging his head.
Frowning, the minister said, "I understand, but I'm afraid you won't be able to join our church."
The man replies, "That's okay, Pastor - we're not allowed back to the grocery store either."
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That’s it, my friends. Another issue to bed. And speaking of bed, I trust you all will be well rested by Saturday so that you can be at the top of your supportive game when you show up to cheer for the Johnnies as they vie for undisputed leadership of the MIAC. Try this cheer on for size, but try it on LOUDLY:
Usurp the Royals
(Or Something Like That.)
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Submitted by R.L. Wicker ’60/’64
2035 Eleanor Avenue, St. Paul, MN 55116
theowick@aol.com; home: 651-699-4697
Website: Unofficial Underground News
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